What:
Adventure Park Victoria
Where:
1251 Bellarine Hwy, Wallington
When:
In summer Mon-Sun 10am-5pm
How much:
Adults $33, senior citizens $25
Back in the late '90s I had a gig manning the "Tunnel of Terror" waterslide at "Adventure Park" in Wallington. Eight hours a day, five days a week I stood at the top of the slide making sure only one bleating rat-faced kid dropped in at a time, and only after the last little wretch had passed the first bend.
Pretty easy, right? Well, I still got fired. After about three weeks of mind-altering monotony I thought it would be cool if I stood guard over the great watery maw while playing my electric guitar. Kind of add to the overall doom-vibe the park owners were going for. So one day I brought my Flying V (signed by Randy Rhodes) to work, with a small amp, and belted out the heaviest tune I know - Nirvana's ‘Negative Creep'. The kids filing up the stairs looked totally freaked! A couple of the younger ones even started bawling, and tried to scramble back down! "There's only one way out, little shit-bird!" I laughed. "And that's down the hole! I'm a negative creep, I'm a negative creep, etc..."
Anyway, they fired me, the scum. Not for the guitar though. I got busted exposing myself to some mums at the "Tiny Tots Splash Zone."
Ambience: hardcore
Difficulty: Won't hurt a bit
Keywords: Waterslide, Adventure
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