Wednesday 30th April
Crash landings can lead to a grazed knee or bruised ego. For anyone who has stacked in a skate rink, don’t let those scooter kids get you down. There are enough Bloody Marys to pick you up. And in case you’re worried someone caught the fall on camera, there’s plenty of voodoo shakedown to escape with until you’re ready to show your face again. After all, in the words of Alfred Pennyworth, Why do we fall? So that we might learn to pick ourselves up.
ThreeThousand 153 - MayDay
Cover shot by Thomas Jeppe. If you would like to submit a cover photo, that would be rad. Email photo@threethousand.com.au.
Crag Head
Galaxies in love
Linda Farrow Jeremy Scott sunglasses
Wendy Bevan
New York Mag
Helmo
Marsu Homme
Real hood Internet
A Place to Bury Strangers
Tell us what's cool
cool@twothousand.com.au
Craggy Island
Galaxy pets
Face-catching
Beverage taxes
New York hag
Hell-mo
Sumo diet
Robin Hood the cheeseball
Burying your guilt (yes it’s fool)
Tell us what's fool
fool@twothousand.com.au
Reverend Jen's Really Cool Neighborhood
What:
Reverend Jen's Really Cool Neighborhood
Where:
Printed Matter or, if that doesn't work, Amazon
How much:
$16 AUD (at current exchange rate)
Related links:
Rev Jen Merchandise including ‘A classic photo of Rev Jen that is surrounded by a tiny gold frame, and hangs in an elegant manner from a lime-green plastic chain'
Bonuses:
Book includes the sixty-page epic puppet show musical, Les Misrahi - an ode to Jen's landlord, recently performed outside his office.
Reverend Jen is, in her own words, a social deviant and freak, which, no doubt makes her the perfect person to write a travel guide to the Lower East Side. There may be a lot of goons on the LES these days, who, according to Jen, eat at Ray's pizza, unaware of the part it played in putting Sal from Rosario's out of business, but the dirty, freakish soul of this block south of Houston beats on.
Says Jen, "When word began to spread that I'd put pen to paper in order to write a travel guide to the Lower East Side, a lot of people asked me, ‘Why the fuck are you writing a travel guide Reverend Jen? For starters, you can't afford to go anywhere...'" But it's lucky she has done because this is the kind of guidance any non-goon visitor to NYC needs.
Rev Jen is a poet, preacher, painter, performer, Patron Saint of the Uncool and Voice of the Downtrodden and Tired. Read: she went to art school and now hangs out drinking 24 oz. cans of Bud. Let her explain how you can easily do the same.
Format: Book
Motivation: Good with a whiskey in the bath
7 Songs, Fabulous Diamonds
What:
7 Songs
Who:
Fabulous Diamonds
On:
Nervous Jerk / Inertia
Where:
Inertia
/ Missing Link / TITLE
MySpace:
Here
Related links
Super 8 Diaries footage
/ Live at Hopetoun / Siltbreeze
Records
Minimal psychniks Fabulous Diamonds release their debut longplayer, 7 Songs, this week, and - as befits one of Melbourne's most idiomatic acts - it's a stoned cold stunner. With maximal overdubbing, longer length tracks and lush, atmospheric tape production, the duo sound more weighty and affective here than ever; their delay-on-everything style, swirling tiers of dub percussion, skronking sax and chanted vocals intensified by close analogue studio attention. Thankfully for fans, the results - though less minimal than we're used to with FDs - retain all the otherworldly spirit of their popular, free-core live performance.
Members Nisa Venerosa and Jarrod Zlatic's subsumption sounds wonderfully deep from the outset, and fun. Whether chanting strangely concrete verse together, playing like synchronised oscillators, making like it's a voodoo shakedown or downtown New York ‘78, the two are never a pair by halves - letting patterns lay themselves down, over and over, patiently, with an attitude of cool submission. See FDs at the launch before they go global with Siltbreeze vinyl and US tour.
Release: Album
To Cure: Hypertension
Keywords: Inertia Records, Missing Link
Crashing to Earth
What:
Crashing to Earth by Blank Clothing
Where:
Most good skate shops
When:
Released on DVD from April 4
Watch the trailer:
Here
Win:
We have one copy of Crashing to Earth to give away. For your chance to win email win@threethousand.com.au with subject line 'those kids on razor scooters get in the way of my bean-plants'
Skateboarding - it's not for everyone. It's noisy and painful and something many of us grow out of when we get into the serious business of finding a career, attending art openings and DJing. Thanks to the MTV treatment, skating is no longer an underground activity and although there are hundreds of public skateparks, they're all swarming with little kids on razor scooters. However, this new release from locally based clothing label Blank is proof that not only is street skating alive in Melbourne, it is looking more creatively and technically inspired than ever.
Skilfully collated from digital and 16mm footage gathered over the past few years, coupled with a soundtrack from local artists such as Eddy Current and Laura, Crashing to Earth is an enjoyable watch for anyone who has gazed longingly at a marble bench. It's also encouraging that some of the riders seem to be of at least legal drinking age. You might even bump into one or two of them at an art opening.
Format: DVD
Mood: Epic
Keywords: Documentary, Skate
The Counterfeiters
What:
The Counterfeiters (Die Fälscher)
When:
Opens May 8
Where:
Cinema Nova
Palace Cinema Como
Rivoli Cinema
Watch the trailer:
Here
Win:
We have ten double passes to The Counterfeiters to give away. For your chance to win email win@threethousand.com.au with subject line 'I once tried making my own five buck note to spend on chips at the canteen'
In 1949, philosopher Theodor Adorno said: "To write poetry after Auschwitz is barbaric.” It’s this fear that instantly hamstrings most Holocaust films, and colours the true story of The Counterfeiters.
A group of Jewish prisoners in a concentration camp are forced to forge foreign currency for the Nazis, receiving special treatment for their skills, but facing the creeping guilt that they’re aiding the enemy. (Why is it that watching counterfeiting procedures is always so goddamn fascinating?)
Despite the expected immensity of horror, some early scenes are curiously unmoving. A smattering of cheesy lines and a fairly awful soundtrack don’t help. When we first see an Auschwitz tattoo, there’s an ominous music sting worthy of a panto.
But watch for by Karl Markovics’ inscrutable, occasionally Cool Hand Luke-ish hero. Watch for Devid Striesow’s charming villain – he’s the evil doppelganger of Claude Rains’ Captain Renault. And watch for the final third, where idealism, morality, survival, and guilt intersect, tearing right through the heart of the film.
Format: Cinema
Mood: Smarts
Diana+ by Lomo
I fucking hate Lomos.
All that don't think, just shoot bullshit. To be stupid is one thing, but to make yourself more stupid? Something else altogether. The whole thing smells like a cult. And not one in which you get a mandatory great haircut. And it kills me how they remade a crappy old Russian camera - with all the crappy old Russian camera faults. Sure, they're cute in a clunky kind of way. But it's a camera, the shutter should work when you press the button.
The good news is, you can ignore all the manifesto wank and the camera still takes great pictures. That plastic lens really does work wonders. Vibrant colours, dark vignetting around the edges, dreamy soft(ish) focus. And the Diana+ is medium format. Nice big negatives and trannies from a nice big plastic lens. This is a lens you could fall in love with. Just don't expect it to be a trouble-free love affair.
Product: Gadgets
Theft: Theft is unlikely: everyone already has one
Keywords: Fat Clothing Stores, Lomography
The Drawing Machine
What:
The Drawing Machine, curated by Ghostpatrol and Miso
Where:
Green-Wood Gallery, 1 Hotham St, South Melbourne
When:
Opening Thurs May 1, 6pm-8pm.
Exhibition continues until Sun May 18, Wed-Sun 10pm-4pm
How much:
Free
From this Thursday night, Green-Wood Gallery are placing works by 17 local illustrators at your fingertips, showcasing some of the Melbourne artists we hold dear. The Drawing Machine mashes sculptural and sound installations from the likes of Al Stark, Dylan Martorell, Tai Snaith and Nathan Gray, alongside fine-line work with Bonsai and Two and Deam and Drew.
Side Project and Junior work together to produce character-based illustrations on salvaged wood surfaces, and Tom O'Hern is an eclectic player, whose work spans from printmaking to large-scale mural production. Other work includes photo-realism and self-published comics, which fuse complex illustrations with a narrative focus.
Tai Snaith, as well as exhibition curator Ghostpatrol have chosen forest animals as a starting point to develop a beautiful mélange of innocence and sinister undertones. The exhibition may require a small amount of physical effort to reach the South Melbourne location, but see it as an excursion, a rare opportunity to witness breakthrough talent from so many genres.
Medium: Illustration
Drink: Anything, as long as you look good holding it
Keywords: Green-Wood Gallery, Tai Snaith, Nathan Gray, Dylan Martorell
Free Comic Book Day
What:
Free Comic Book Day
When:
Sat May 3, all day
Where:
Comic shops everywhere, such as:
Classic Comics, Shop 7, 50 Bourke St, Melbourne, Comics R Us, Level 1, 220 Bourke St, Melbourne and Minotaur, 121 Elizabeth Street, Melbourne
Image credit:
From All-Star Superman #1. Written by Grant Morrison. Art by Frank Quietly
No doubt comic books will soon snake down to the bottom of the cultural ladder again but, for now, nicely bound graphic novels are available in credible bookshops. Why would you face the lowly, unwelcoming comic store? Four words and an exclamation point: Free Comic Book Day!
Once a year, publishers pick a single issue to give away in an attempt to lure new customers into the crack-like addiction of monthly comic buying. There are anthology-style samplers from indie artists, Simpsons comics for kids, Mike Mignola’s dependably awesome Hellboy, and more.
Best by a wide margin, though, is the first issue of All-Star Superman. It’s an American icon reinvented by two Scotsmen: written by the perpetual idea machine that is Grant Morrison and drawn by Frank Quietly, who is half-Chris Ware, half-Jack Kirby. It’s one of the best comics of the last decade – and the only superhero comic to make Time Magazine’s top 10 graphic novels of 2007 list, if that’s the kind of reassurance you need to face hypermuscled men in circus underwear again.
Besides, it’s free. To paraphrase Spider-Man’s theme: action is its own reward.
Product: Books
Anatomy: Heart
Keywords: Graphic novels, Comics
Dexter
What:
Dexter
Where:
123 Queens Pde, Clifton Hill
When:
Early-late (ambiguous, we know. It's just how they roll)
Contact:
0433 815 423
Sure, Dexter has its tough side. The Bloody Marys are a peppery concoction of kicks and wallops that will cure a hangover with the swift bitch slap exclusive to Vitamin C. But the bar's only true sociopathic streak is found in Killers, the book of murderers' profiles propped up on the counter, which has enough literary msg to keep you there all day anyway.
The name may remind you of a serial killer, but Dexter is really quite lovely. There's a generously stocked bar of European beers, Pipsqueak apple cider, spirits and absinthe that, if you ask nicely, will be served on fire. Booze aside, the breakfasts of green eggs (not the Dr Seuss but the we-love-chickens kind) or beef and bean stew are hard to argue with.
While the menu is all prepared with love, the entire café is designed to never let you go. There are deck chairs out the back with super-convenient pulley-outey things to rest your drink on. The upstairs quarters are furnished with sofas, a record player and backgammon. And you know what else will make love-hearts pop out of your eyeballs? Wireless internet. (Aroooogah!)
Venue: Bar
Meal: All day
Keywords: Wireless, Clifton Hill, Breakfast
Houlette 7" launch
What:
Houlette 7" launch with Richard Easton and Pinto
Where:
The Toff in Town, Lvl 2, Curtin House, 252 Swanston St, Melbourne
When:
TONIGHT! Wed Apr 30, doors 8pm
How much:
$10 on the door
Win:
We have a double pass and a 7" to give away. To enter, email win@threethousand.com.au with the subject line ‘thank you life, thank you love'
Description:
Any comparison to Edith Piaf is tough to carry around these days being that even Piaf looks beige next to Marion Cotillard. But Melbourne's Felicity Cripps (Houlette) has also been compared to Tom Waits, the nation of Iceland and country music, leavening the Frenchness nicely. Come and see Houlette and her prose-and-roses band launch their new 7" single ‘The Escape' (out through EXO) tonight. (It is true there is some angels in this city.)
Event: DJs
Stimulus: W
Keywords: The Toff in Town, Folk
International Skull Drawing Competition
What:
International Skull Drawing Competition launch
When:
TONIGHT! Wed Apr 30, 6pm-9pm
Where:
Rise and Fall Gallery (the lift) as well as stairwell and rooftop of Curtin House, 252 Swanston St, Melbourne
How much:
Free
Description:
Bony structures of hollows and plates will be exposed in all their garish glory tonight. Rise and Fall‘s International Skull Drawing Competition has been reeling in entries from far, wide and basically from anyplace where people know what a skull is: and that's pretty much the world covered. The panel of judges will examine with a very loose list of criteria but with imagination in mind, a winner will be crowned and everyone will go home hoping they will never see that many skulls in one room ever again.
Event: Exhibition
Stimulus: W
Keywords: Illustration, Curtin House, Launch
Super Sale at Alphaville
What:
Super Sale at Alphaville
Where:
184 Brunswick St, Fitzroy
Opposite Alphaville Fitzroy store
When:
Fri May 2 - Sat May 3, 10am-6pm, Sun May 4 12pm-4pm
How much:
Cash only
Description:
If Alphaville told us they had a rack with 10%-off garments we'd probably pop in and fetch ourselves a bargain. And, hell, even if Alphaville put a freaking carrot on a stick and stuck it in our face while we were walking past the store, we'd be lured in anyway. So we take stupid amounts of delight to tell you that they're having Super Sale with racks up to 80% off. The precious pieces of Douglas & Hope and Megan Park will also be found amongst the reduced treasures. There's a good chance carrots on sticks will be floating about as a sure-fire tactic to lure passers by away from the store.
Event: Sales
Stimulus: sound the horns!
Eddy Current Suppression Ring instore launch thing for 'Primary Colours'
What:
Eddy Current Suppression Ring instore launch thing for Primary Colours
Where:
Missing Link, Basement, 405 Bourke St
When:
Fri May 2, 5pm
How much:
Free
Description:
Primary Colours comes out May 3, but the launch at The Corner isn't until May 31 (a long time). Don't you want to hear them play it now? Sure, you can't do any rafter-hanging at Missing Link but you can't do any drinking longnecks there either. ECSR are supported by UV Race, who, according to one reviewer, "wanted to make a band like the Ramones but ended up doing something better (thank fuck cos the Ramones suck except for that Warthog song)."
Event: Launch
Stimulus: W
Keywords: Eddy Current Suppression Ring, Missing Link
Fabulous Diamonds '7 Songs' album launch
What:
Fabulous Diamonds 7 Songs album launch
Where:
The Toff in Town, Lvl 2, Curtin House, 252 Swanston St, Melbourne
When:
Sat May 3, doors 9pm
How much:
$10 on the door
Win:
We are so excited to have two double passes and two albums to give away (if you win the tickets you win the album). To enter, email win@threethousand.com.au with the subject line ‘voodoo shakedown'
Description:
Enough! Is there no-one who will ask the question: does Jarrod really have a back that hairy? I guess we just did. The answer, however, might never come to light because the Fabs are going on a 30-date US tour and this is their only Australian launch for 7 Songs. Let's give them a send off they'll remember so they come back to us, with or without waxing rash.
Event: Bands
Stimulus: A
Keywords: Launch, Nervous Jerk, Fabulous Diamonds, The Toff in Town
El Guincho
What:
El Guincho
When:
Wed May 7, doors 8pm
Where:
East Brunswick Club, 280 Lygon Street, East Brunswick
How much:
$18
Description:
The not-really dancefloor of the East Brunswick Club will combust with heaving bodies wishing they all had frilly skirts. El Guincho’s musical salad of thumping percussion, celebratory chanting and tribal rhythms were heralded a few weeks ago. And we’re giving you plenty of warning to purchase tickets for a party not for the faint-hearted but for those who are in need of a taste of a sweat flavoured, tequila fuelled party where Qua, Barrage and AIH DJs will be preventing unnecessary dancefoor lulls.
Event: Bands
Stimulus: C
Keywords: East Brunswick, Barrage
Now that the cold-and-flu season is well and truly upon us, so toois an influx of cold-and-flu remedies. Be it ginger, garlic or even codliver oil; everyone has a suggestion.
Talk to anyone from the pre-Codral days, they’ll tell you that the hot toddy is the only solution to a case of the sniffles. That was until Toddy hopped onto the scene with their decidedly warm yet aesthetically pleasing pyjamas, singlets, leggings and long johnsthat by virtue of making sure you don’t get cold - also make sure youdon’t get a cold. To keep you in fine health we’ve got two singlets,dress, short and legging combos to give away. To be in the running justtell us the following…
This week’s question:
What is the best way to cure a cold?
a) Drink right through it
b) Stay in bed and feel sorry for yourself
c) Drink hot toddies
d) Wear Toddy PJs
To be in the running send your answer AND postal address to win@threethousand.com.au. Winners will be notified by email. NOTE: Subscriber only entry. Not a subscriber? No sweat. Sign up here.
ThreeThousand is a weekly snapshot of Melbourne's subculture, fired by email into the loving arms of people who realise that the best things in life are often hard to find. It is compiled by an amorphous gaggle of writers, stylists, designers and photographers who all like huddling under that big umbrella we like to call creativity. Without editorial independence ThreeThousand has nothing. All editorial you read is featured because it's worth it - not because it's paid for.
Advertising Partnerships:
ThreeThousand is a trusted and proven medium for advertisers to engage with Melbourne's most elusive individuals - our subscribers. Each issue offers one advertiser the opportunity to have sole presence in the e-newsletter. A variety of placements (three, to be exact) are also available on threethousand.com.au. For more information on advertising with ThreeThousand contact Francesco at frunch@rightanglepublishing.com and Robbie at robert@rightanglepublishing.com.
Feedback:
Have something to say? Then say it by emailing talk@threethousand.com.au
Disclaimer:
The information in ThreeThousand is subject to change. Although we attempt to ensure that the content at the time of publication is correct, we do not guarantee its accuracy or currency. Right Angle Publishing accepts no responsibility to you or anyone else arising from any use or reliance on the information contained in ThreeThousand or any inaccuracy in the information. The views and opinions expressed on material included in ThreeThousand may not reflect those of Right Angle Publishing.
Contact:
Right Angle Publishing
Level 6, Curtin House
252 Swanston Street
Melbourne, 3000
+ 61 3 9662 1657
ThreeThousand's MySpace:
myspace.com/threethousand
Group Publisher:
Barrie Barton
barrie@rightanglepublishing.com
Editor:
Penny Modra
penny@threethousand.com.au
Acting Editor:
Isabel Dunstan
isabel@threethousand.com.au
Acting Assistant Editor
Sophie Gaston
sophie@threethousand.com.au
Film Editor:
Martyn Pedler
martyn@threethousand.com.au
Music Editor:
Mark Gomes
mark@threethousand.com.au
READ Editor:
Kirsten Law
kirsten@threethousand.com.au
Design Monkeys:
tin&ed
Image and Web Monkey:
Remi Carette
Taran Hubbert
STREET Pics Monkeys:
Mia Mala McDonald
Jamima Wu
Contributing Monkeys:
Nadia Saccardo
Max Olijnyk
Chris Barton
Jadan Sproulle-Carrol
Stuart Geddes
Check out our 'Meet Me for a Drink' column in The Age EG liftout every Friday...
Meet Me For a Drink Monkeys:
Kirsten Law
Penny Modra
Simon Godfrey
Mark Gomes
Matt Hurst
Josh Gardiner
Isabel Dunstan
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