'C' Grade (Time to Jam)
'C' Grade will be an alphanumeric equivalent for Third Class. But it will be so much more than that. First of all, it's in a basement, so that's less effort right there. Brought to you by the guys who helped to bring us Justice last year, alongside M. Honky Tonks Delaney, ‘C' Grade is going to be wild in the kind of way that a bar with a drink called ‘The Hose' is wild.
Dexter
Sure, Dexter has its tough side. The Bloody Marys are a peppery concoction of kicks and wallops that will cure a hangover with the swift bitch slap exclusive to Vitamin C. But the bar's only true sociopathic streak is found in Killers, the book of murderers' profiles propped up on the counter, which has enough literary msg to keep you there all day anyway.
The Sweatshop
Melbourne's latest nook-and-cranny bar The Sweatshop welcomes you with all the warmth of a Thai callgirl. Owners Jason Chan and Anthony Herzog have recreated a Bangkok factory basement, complete with seedy red lighting, wilting ferns, and rolls of oriental fabrics suspended from the ceiling alongside exposed power cables.
Gerald's Bar
There was a time when I used to be completely intimidated by wine and only know two things about it. I knew Cab Savs were the most robust, and I knew there was some kudos to be found saying stuff like ‘great legs', or ‘fantastic year'. There was only so long I could live hiding behind these snippets before people found out I was completely full of shit.
Palmz
Don't ask how they got up there, but those sixteen full-sized palm trees on the roof of the Carlton Hotel are but the icing on the cake - the tassel on the metre maid's bikini - of a new Gold Coast -esque oasis.
Palmz at the Carlton opens this weekend. Now, instead of smoking in the shaft-like courtyard on level one, staring up at the sky, immune to the sun's healing UV rays, you can develop a bronzed, surf-coast-real-estate agent hue on the roof.
Atticus Finch
The lovable crew behind the boutique wine store Black Hearts & Sparrows Wine Purveyors on Punt Road, Windsor, have been doing the wine game proud for years, sating the most demanding of palates.
Now, at the vanguard of Lygon Street’s increasingly gentrified lower stretch, they’re not only upgrading a spanking new shop, they’ve also revamped its neighbouring, former goth-rock den into the top notch bar, Atticus Finch.
ThreeThousand Christmas Party
For some, end-of-year Christmas parties begin with complimentary sandwiches and shandies. These parties usually result in a wild game of spin the bottle and the accounts guy atop a trestle table with his pants down. We know this because we've spent the past few weeks underneath a bar where these kind of office parties have exploded.
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