Author results: Robert Coleman
Hats from Smart Alec Hatters
People aren't wearing enough hats. Before Dr Follicles started offering rockabilly quiffs for a strawberry and handful of change, hats played a vital role in society. In the '50s, William S had short-brimmed felt strewn across his junk-slimmed face, masking his identity as he 'grifted' homeless in New York subways.
Foxx on Fire EP launch with Hot Little Hands and World's End Press
What:
Foxx on Fire EP launch with Hot Little Hands and World's End Press
Where:
The Birmingham, 333 Smith St, Fitzroy
When:
Mon Nov 2, doors 8pm
How much:
$10 on the door
Description:
If Foxx on Fire was a horse you'd chase it just to see its psychedelic mane flap in the wind. No sane punter could refute the claim that Foxx on Fire is Disco Noir, just as they wouldn't dispute that Phar Lap was the first equine eunuch. How's the form looking so far? Back Foxx on Fire for their EP launch before they achieve stardom and are sent to a stud farm to chum on tranqs and Horny Goat Weed for the rest of their days.
Event: Bands
Stimulus: psychedelic rock
The Once Overs' EP Launch
What:
The Once Overs' EP Launch
Where:
Cherry Bar, ACDC Lane, Melbourne
When:
Fri Oct 23, doors 9pm
How much:
$10 on the door
Description:
While Cherry Bar no longer elicits The Fear, and the glass and blood has largely disappeared from the floor and knuckles of patrons, bands like The Once Overs still make good on the threat that Garage Punk is not dead. Crazy frontman: check. Power chords: check. Bass player with rockabilly hair and the authenticity to pull it off: check.
Event: Bands & DJs
Stimulus: Chaos
The Untitled Shop
Shopping for threads on Brunswick Street used to be a joke. Luckily, on his way home from a foot massage, Fredrik (ex Hem&Haw) bumped into the boys from Who Am Eye. "My feet feel great, we should open up a store together", "Now that's an idea!", the boys exclaimed. "Yay," said Humphrey.
Get The Hint Stickies
During my third stint in the pen I learnt two things: to respect my body, to utilise profanities and to count. I miss the days of abusing the tattooed inmates who tried to barter with tobacco for a ‘go' of my peach-scented soap. "Fuck that," I used to say. When a guy got shived in the shower, I used to shout for the screw, "This is fucking urgent.
The Untitled Shop SALE! Who Am Eye and Malmö (ex Hem&Haw)
What:
The Untitled Shop SALE! Who Am Eye and Malmö (ex Hem&Haw)
Where:
399b Brunswick St, Fitzroy
When:
From Fri Sept 11, 11am-6pm. Open for two weeks or ‘til there's nothing left!
How much:
Fresh threads from $40!
Description:
The desert can be a strange place. Luckily, the gents from Who Am Eye and Malmö (ex Hem&Haw) are providing respite from the barren land with The Untitled Shop, selling tees from $40, shirts from $50, jumpers and jackets from $60, and, being Cheap Friday, jeans from $80. One-off samples, current and last season's stock, priced cheaper than a fake ID from Steve Bracks' son.
Event: Sales
Stimulus: Cheap Treasure
Decoder Ring
What:
Decoder Ring
Where:
HiFi Bar, 125 Swanston St, Melbourne
When:
Sat Sept 5, doors 8pm
How much:
$25 +BF from here
Win:
Thanks to Inertia we have 2 dbls to give away! To enter, email win@threethousand.com.au with the subject ‘My Farts on Fire'
Description:
Brian Eno is in their Myspace top friends and they have a song called 'Rough Sex' - it's safe to say I'm no longer a Decoder Ring virgin. They might not be touring with Coldplay anymore, but they're still replying to Chris Martian's text messages concerning microwavable dishes and Gwyneth Paltrow's morning breath; "Don't worry, Chris, it's plastic.
Event: Bands
Stimulus: Easy Listening
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